I feel so stressssss and soooo tired!!!!!!!
I'm just an AA and there are a lot of workloads allocated to me, I'm not a clever person as I concerned and I'm sure they definitely overestimated my ability to work.
You expect a new joiner to follow up 24 subsi financial reports?? And I need to follow up those senior's jobs which are all outstanding in active and semi-active companies and the main point is I know NUTS!!!
How can I possibly finish it within 2 weeks with the help of one assistant manager while he is handling three jobs at a same time?
I'm dying soon, SERIOUSLY!!
ARGH, why should I choose accounting at the first place? Crazy me!!!
I need love and care but there's none for me, I feel so miserable...
Friday, April 2, 2010
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
looking back...
Looking back my old posts, there's one I mentioned about having a LDR ain't easy.
Now, I could tell it is very hard. Not only mutual understanding and trust matter, it includes all sorts of factors which can easily brake up the chain of relationship.
As I stay longer, the more issues coming in till a point I need to get a break from it. But what kind of break I can expect to have? I realized there is not a single break for a relationship, there's only a real break which is to break up. However, this is not what I want.
I love him more than anyone I'd met, I suppose. Shall see how it goes.
Now, I could tell it is very hard. Not only mutual understanding and trust matter, it includes all sorts of factors which can easily brake up the chain of relationship.
As I stay longer, the more issues coming in till a point I need to get a break from it. But what kind of break I can expect to have? I realized there is not a single break for a relationship, there's only a real break which is to break up. However, this is not what I want.
I love him more than anyone I'd met, I suppose. Shall see how it goes.
Sad...again.
I really dont quite know what happened to me nowadays, getting emo easily and keep looking for fights with him. Is it my problem?
I know the answer, obviously, it is.
But why?
I just want to get a chance to see him only, is that my fault too?
Yes!! My fault as being so wanted to see him till a point he got irritated and pissed off. The reason he got pissed because his intepretation from my words is that he has the time to come up but he never show up. From his point is, I'm childish, I don't know how to think as an understandable girlfriend and I shouldn't ask the same question twice as he already said NO at the first place.
I have a question. Am I too dependent or what? I hate the way he said I don't get his point. There is only one point of him which is he is very busy with his work.
I know he is super duper busy with his works, but what you expect me to do? I'm not a superwoman with no feelings and emotions, I cannot pretend as in I miss you but I could never show my emotions in front of you.
Or maybe this is the one you prefer? Keep quiet and hide all the emotions from you or else it will bring us fight like now. If this it is, fine, I will start learning to be a emotionless person.
Loneliness kills I could tell, my mind had an evil thought which something I could do to kill off my loneliness. Once it is a green light, I will be back to the old road I'd been which this is the least I would want to choose. So, don't push me too hard.
Please be reminded I am not a superwoman and I need love.
I know the answer, obviously, it is.
But why?
I just want to get a chance to see him only, is that my fault too?
Yes!! My fault as being so wanted to see him till a point he got irritated and pissed off. The reason he got pissed because his intepretation from my words is that he has the time to come up but he never show up. From his point is, I'm childish, I don't know how to think as an understandable girlfriend and I shouldn't ask the same question twice as he already said NO at the first place.
I have a question. Am I too dependent or what? I hate the way he said I don't get his point. There is only one point of him which is he is very busy with his work.
I know he is super duper busy with his works, but what you expect me to do? I'm not a superwoman with no feelings and emotions, I cannot pretend as in I miss you but I could never show my emotions in front of you.
Or maybe this is the one you prefer? Keep quiet and hide all the emotions from you or else it will bring us fight like now. If this it is, fine, I will start learning to be a emotionless person.
Loneliness kills I could tell, my mind had an evil thought which something I could do to kill off my loneliness. Once it is a green light, I will be back to the old road I'd been which this is the least I would want to choose. So, don't push me too hard.
Please be reminded I am not a superwoman and I need love.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
sigh...
I'm so sad...
Feel kinda disappointed that he couldn't make it, but I understand he needs to work.
Seriously, I'm not complaining, just feel kinda lonely.
-emo-
Feel kinda disappointed that he couldn't make it, but I understand he needs to work.
Seriously, I'm not complaining, just feel kinda lonely.
-emo-
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Coward?
Suddenly I feel like I'm a real coward.
I got a question from him which made me feel like a coward.The question is: You really afraid of your dad? My answer is: Yes, kind of.
Yes, you can say I'm a coward of concealing my relationship from my dad, but everything I'm doing now, is for our future. I need to bear the consequences of telling him the truth, if he agreed, of course it is nothing better than great, but if he disagreed, I dare not face with that situation.
And one more, I don't really want to nag you over "it", but Please consider, it's for your own good and as well as our future.
I got a question from him which made me feel like a coward.The question is: You really afraid of your dad? My answer is: Yes, kind of.
Yes, you can say I'm a coward of concealing my relationship from my dad, but everything I'm doing now, is for our future. I need to bear the consequences of telling him the truth, if he agreed, of course it is nothing better than great, but if he disagreed, I dare not face with that situation.
And one more, I don't really want to nag you over "it", but Please consider, it's for your own good and as well as our future.
Monday, January 11, 2010
lonely...
Do you feel lonely?
I guess everyone does and this is what I'm feeling now.
A sudden feeling running through my veins in the middle of the night, ain't a good thing.
The feeling of loneliness is so abstract, it can't be described but it can be felt.
I need someone by my side but I don't know who to be chosen. Is it him or him?
One thing I'm pretty sure is that neither him can accompany me now.
Was this the reason I feel so lonely? God knows.
I guess everyone does and this is what I'm feeling now.
A sudden feeling running through my veins in the middle of the night, ain't a good thing.
The feeling of loneliness is so abstract, it can't be described but it can be felt.
I need someone by my side but I don't know who to be chosen. Is it him or him?
One thing I'm pretty sure is that neither him can accompany me now.
Was this the reason I feel so lonely? God knows.
Saturday, January 9, 2010
It's never easy
Relationship ain't easy.
A long distance relationship even harder.
Normal distribution shows that percentage of couples broke up in a LDR is higher than those who are still intact together, regardless of whether they were having a strong foundation.
Do we conform into the norm or maybe we are the odd one? I reckon it belongs to both the individuals sharing the mutual understanding of being in a LDR.
It's never been easy to be involved in it, but it could be rather easy if we understand how to make sure the games roll on. Trust is the key of survival.
-bless-
A long distance relationship even harder.
Normal distribution shows that percentage of couples broke up in a LDR is higher than those who are still intact together, regardless of whether they were having a strong foundation.
Do we conform into the norm or maybe we are the odd one? I reckon it belongs to both the individuals sharing the mutual understanding of being in a LDR.
It's never been easy to be involved in it, but it could be rather easy if we understand how to make sure the games roll on. Trust is the key of survival.
-bless-
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